Long time no see...

I haven't gotten on here in a bit.  I had my 34th birthday and then took a vacation down to the keys of Florida.  I went to visit with my father, sister and her family.  I was hoping to get in some time to talk with her about everything I am going through.  But I forgot how uncomfortable the whole thing makes most people.  I understand, it is a sensitive subject, but really?  Is it that bad?  Or what ever happened to just hugs?  Oh well.  The ocean was beautiful and I did get to have my drinks with umbrellas!  Yay!  On the way home I sat in front of a young mom with three little kids all under the age of four.  When we were getting off, she had no help and three sleeping kids!  I asked her if she wanted me to carry one of them to help her.  So I carried a sleeping year old baby.  Oh man, trying to hold back the tears!  It was so sweet, the heavy weight of a little one totally asleep.  It hit me in that spot, you know the one.  Deep in the center of my being that wants that so bad.  Near my stomach, behind my heart.  It was a sweet moment.  She was really grateful, but so was I.